Books I've read so far in 2016: No Spoilers

 Let's get one thing out of the way, I haven't followed the reading list I blogged about a couple months back. I started getting overwhelmed when I actually sat down and started looking at all the books available to be from my local Public Library in e-book format. Yes, they send them right to my kindle. The weather where I'm from has also not been the best. This winter has brought much more snow than anticipated, so I've had much more time to read. My goal for the year is 52 books, but I'm well on my way to surpass that. I might even double it. As of yesterday I've read 13 books this year, and I want to share with you my opinions on them along with the dates that I finished them.

1.     Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell

January 1, 2016

My goal for January 1st this year was to read a book cover to cover in one day. I'm glad I chose Eleanor and Park because it's a wonderful book to start the year out with. Most of us never see what actually happens in people's lives at home outside of work or school, and this book gives an inside look at what some people might be going through. This book will humble you and make you appreciate the family you have. Not only did it keep my attention, but it made me more aware of what people around me might be going through. It teaches of being less self-centered and reaching out to others. You truly never know how good people can be if they receive a little help. There's also a love story mixed in, but I won't spoil it for you.

2. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee

January 5, 2016

I'm sure everyone knows the story line of To Kill a Mockingbird, but just in case you don't, this book is about two children of an attorney in town that has agreed to represent a black man for a crime against a white woman. Discrimination is a big topic in this book, and it teaches several lessons about life and acceptance of people regardless of age, skin color, education, or occupation. This is a classic, and if you haven't read it you need to do so.... NOW. There is no American classic better than this one. I have the sequel to this book which is called Go Set a Watchman that I plan to start soon.

3. The Liar by Nora Roberts

January 10, 2016

If you know of Nora Roberts than you know this is most definitely a suspenseful book. When a woman's husband goes missing and she finds a safe deposit box full of secrets along with an unbelievable amount of debt she didn't know about she has to start out life again back at her mom's house. She is struggling to fit in back in her home town with her daughter and trying to find answers to all her questions. Clearly, she should have just left her suspicions to herself. I found myself wanting to skip entire pages (I didn't actually do it though) just to see what happened.

4. Maybe this Christmas by Sarah Morgan

January 19, 2016

I'll be honest, if you need a sappy love story that actually has a pretty good story line, this is the book for you. I liked it, but it wasn't my favorite. For some reason I imagined this book having must more depth. If you are just looking for something to read on a snowy day like I was though, this is a good pick. I don't know if I could read this book any other time of year just because it is set around the winter time and a cold climate. A ski lodge to be exact. You'll have to let me know what you think.

5. Let it Snow by John Green, Maureen Johnson, & Lauren Myracle

January 20, 2016

There are three stories in this book. Each one is as good as the last. I would also prefer to read this during a cold time of year such as winter, but the stories are wonderful and put together nicely. This one is pretty high on my list for a winter read!

6. A Paper Bag Christmas by Kevin Alan Milne

January 21, 2016

A friend let me borrow this book, and I am so thankful she did. Get ready to laugh and cry. This book is set in a Children's Hospital around Christmas. Two young healthy boys volunteer at the hospital, and it changes their lives forever. This book also lets you see into the side most of us try not to think about and that is a parent with a terminally ill child. Their life and their needs are no longer the same. This book is heartwarming and just what I needed. You'll be humbled.

7. The Melody Lingers On by Mary Higgins Clark

January 27, 2016

I have a soft spot for Mary Higgins Clark anyway, but this book is amazing. If your looking for suspense this is it! This book has everything from an interior designer, a missing man, embezzlement of billions of dollars, people wanting in on the action at every turn, survivors, love, and a crazy plot twist that I never saw coming.  I seriously never saw the ending coming. I was completely blind sighted, and I loved every minute of it.

8. November 9 by Colleen Hoover

February 5, 2016

No wonder this book has been such a success. It has a great story line. Two young adults meet up on the same day every year. He encourages her to live her life to the fullest after a tragic accident and she encourages him to write a book. This is another book that left me in awe. I never even imagined how these two lives would combine every November 9. I was physically angry at a character in this book if that tells you anything. I recommended it to all of my friends.

9. You by Caroline Kepnes

February 8, 2016

This book is nothing but creepy. Let me advise you not to read this if you live alone or are squeamish in any way. I had trouble getting through this book because of the language used as well so you have been warned. Stephen King actually released a quote saying that this book was thrilling and scary. I don't even have words for this book. It completely freaked me out, but I couldn't put it down.

10. The Library at Mount Char by Scott Hawkins

February 13, 2016

This book is definitely out of character from the rest on this list so far. I found this book on the NYT Best Sellers list and had to read it just because of the title. The first 5 chapters left me scratching my head wondering what in the heck was going on. If it does the same to you just take my advise and KEEP READING. This book is insane and good. I read this in just a couple days. It's hilarious and it has a story line that I have never in my life heard of. I'm sure if I read it again I could find holes in the plot, but as far as I'm concerned it was a good book. This book also has one of my Favorite Characters in it, Erwin.

11. The Husband's Secret by Liane Moriarty

February 14, 2016

There is no better way to describe this book than by it's actual review from the NYT....

"Imagine that your husband wrote you a letter, to be opened after his death. Imagine, too, that the letter contains his deepest, darkest secret—something with the potential to destroy not just the life you built together, but the lives of others as well. Imagine, then, that you stumble across that letter while your husband is still very much alive. . . ."

This book is told my a couple different points of view in order to see the consequences from different perspectives. It took me a few chapters to really grasp each character, but this plot twist is worth the entire story. I would have never thought of that! This book actually gets a little deeper into emotional connections and feelings of guilt and remorse.

12. The Luckiest Girl Alive by Jessica Knoll

February 19, 2016

I CAN'T EVEN..... THIS BOOK.....

This book ripped out all of my heart strings. It physically pained me to read this, but it also had a story that I couldn't put down. This book tells a first hand perspective of being raped and surviving a school shooting. It's brutally honest, its scary, and it's painful to read, but it's SOOOO worth it.

13. Me Before You by JoJo Moyes

February 23, 2016

I finished this book last night, and all day I have been so grateful for what my life has become. More often than not, we look away from people with disabilities and try not to draw attention to it. This book draws complete attention and goes into depth about the struggles of a spinal cord energy and the relationships of those involved in the healing process. It also raises the question of can you ever really heal? With a Dr. Kevorkian twist and a six month limit this book is one you should read. It's not suspenseful or action packed, but it's honest and heartfelt. The movie will come out this summer!

-Kayla

Becoming Annie Oakley

“If you own guns people will call you paranoid, but that’s ridiculous. If I own a gun what the heck do I have to be paranoid for?”

In case you weren’t fortunate enough to grow up in a family of gun lovers like I was, or even if you were but never learned the basics, I’m here to share what my military bother and sweet gun totin’ daddy taught me that were passed down to them.

Going to a gun range and shooting isn’t enough, because learning how to properly handle, carry, and shoot a gun for the right reasons is important. Now I’m not certified to teach a gun shooting class or lessons, but I am here to give some tips and pointers that beginners should know and should always keep in the back of your mind. My dad told me repeatedly, “Never aim a gun at something you don’t intend to shoot.

• Daddy is a wise man. Never point a gun at something you don’t intend to shoot.
•  Confidence is key, but no one is "too good" to make mistakes. 
•  Never store guns and ammo in the same spot and side-by-side, as anyone, possibly the one person you don’t need (children, attacker, etc) could load it and shoot it when stored that way.  Easily accessible for you is a given, but you want to be the only one in your house loading and shooting your gun.
•  Treat every gun as if it’s loaded.
• Get familiar with where the safety on the gun is and how to quickly turn the safety on or off.
• Never hand anyone a loaded gun if not on safety.  Duh, right? What do I mean? Your dad, boyfriend, friends, etc. will ask to see your new pistol. And you’ll want to show it off! Before handing it over, unload it or flip it on safety and point it at the ground, not at the person your handing it to (it’s easy to forget in a moment of excitement and I'm sorry ladies but we can be ditzy).

Next, what type of pistol is good for women? Where do you start when searching for a pistol? I have a few favorites:

1.     First, you’ll want it to fit comfortably in your hands. Go to the nearest reliable gun shop and feel some out. 

2.     Glock 19 9mm Luger. This gun fits great in smaller hands and is also pretty easy to conceal. It has some bells and whistles that other pistols lack.

3.     S&W M&P .38 Special. This gun is a revolver but is awesome for women because it’s so lightweight. It is only about 14 ounces! You can get this gun with a laser which would be ideal for stressful situations when needing to make one quick accurate shot in an attack.

4.     Glock 42. This is one of the smallest of the Glocks and for obvious reasons is great for women. This gun only holds 6 rounds and one in the chamber, but with practice at a shooting range you can get the hang of quickly and carefully changing out magazines. This gun is really fun for just shooting at the range or on the farm for target practice!

It seems like more and more each day I see girls wanting to go out and buy pistols for protection, but there's nothing more dangerous than someone with a gun that doesn't know how to shoot or carry. I am a full supporter of the NRA and the freedom of owning guns. Therefore, I also fully support gun safety. It is something you should always consider a priority when owning or shooting. I personally don’t carry on a day-to-day basis, and only shoot for recreation and/or hunting. But if the need ever arises to carry, I’ll be fully prepared and you should be, too!
-Caroline

Dessert? Yes, Please.

This is going to be an extremely honest post starting with my weight. Let me begin with a disclaimer that by no means do I think that I am fat. The older I get the more comfortable I become in my body as a woman. Also, I am not a nutritionist and I understand that everyone has different things that work for them. That being said here's my story...

Up until the last couple of years I was a complete fitness junkie. I loved weights, cardio, kickboxing, zumba, HIIT training, hiking, you name it. I was a very active person. When you stay that active you can eat much more junk food without it effecting you weight wise. Not that this is healthy for you, but it's true. I was eating anything I could because I was starving all the time.

Things really began to change a few years ago when I purchased my own home. I had fractured my foot not long after moving in, and was wearing a boot for several weeks. In that time frame my body and metabolism completely changed. Yes, my weight went up some, but I began to fill out in all the places a woman should and I loved my new figure. I took some time off from the gym and things were good for about another year when my weight started slowly creeping up, and I was becoming less active. I won't completely blame law school for this, but it definitely didn't help. I was working a full time job and in law school so my life became pretty repetitive. I had a desk job and had to read or study all the time. You know what goes along with studying when you are exhausted? A lot of caffeine and fast food. You know what goes with being tired in the morning and having to commute 2 hours to work? A large coffee and a biscuit. I became addicted to caffeine (which I am still working to decrease my intake of), and I was eating like a freshman in college without a meal card. I had to get my stuff together. After deciding not to return to law school things got a little better. I began running again, and even though I was getting better at it (I even ran my first 5 mile race) I know that running isn't my thing. During the holiday season of 2015 I have become more serious about my weight and my health.

What I've learned so far is that what I weigh doesn't matter as long as I feel good, and I am treating my body properly. I've learned that if you don't splurge you'll go crazy. I've learned to use moderation, be active when I get time (even if it's just doing lunges to the bathroom), and never being negative toward myself or my body. I've accepted the fact that I'm never going to wear a size two pants again not only because that's unrealistic for my height, but also because I don't want to look like that again. I'm a woman now, not a 15 year old girl. Women have curves, women have shape, and women respect their bodies. I will eat healthier if I gain a few pounds and start walking more now that it's warmed up outside, but I will not beat myself up for having a piece of dessert. I enjoy my life. I have recently started yoga and am working on toning up, but the main reason I do it is because it makes me feel good. I feel better about my body, and it completely clears my mind. I say just find something that works for you that you enjoy and do it! If you feel bad about your legs, do lunges. If you feel bad about your stomach, do crunches. As long as you feel good about yourself that's all that matters. Every 'body' is different, but we should all learn to appreciate what we have and embrace it instead of wishing to change it.

 -Kayla

What I need in a man.

Dear men,

You need to have a relationship with God. Let me rephrase and say that you need to have your own relationship with God. Do not conform what you believe into what you think I need from a man. That is a lie and very deceitful. The truth will come out. I need a man to be the spiritual leader of my future household. If you just read that sentence and thought that by doing that you might seem less manly, that if you raise your hand in church, somehow you are less of a man, well then you need to hit your knees and learn how to be humble before the God that created you. If you aren't willing to do that I am not willing to let you into my free time.

I sin. Its my nature. Its yours as well. As a Christian we are to date someone that is "equally yolked" (Look it up). The reason for this is because if we both have a sinful nature and neither of us have a relationship with God than all we do is continue to fall into a life of sin. (You may not even notice that your doing it because usually sin is really fun.) I don't need a man that will influence me to do the wrong things. I need a man that will help me overcome some of my own personal internal struggles and become a better woman and Christian. We are not meant to be alone nor are we meant to be matched for life with unequal values.

I'm asking all the men to man up. This isn't one sided either. I'd like to ask women to do the same. The fact that we are single doesn't mean we need to live the life society shows us until that other person finally arrives in our life. If we don't try to make ourselves better now, we may never get the chance. In 2016, my next resolution is to wrestle with my demons, conquer fears, and refuse to lower my standards and settle for a life less than what God has planned for me. I've spent to much time worrying about and reliving the past. It's time to move on.

That being said, when two Christians date it is easier to discuss big issues and determine where you are both moving in the relationship. There is more respect for each other because you are trying to help the other person instead of just take from them to make yourself happy.

Sincerely,
A sinful Christian woman that struggles with life and dating

-Kayla

Why Being Mom Isn't Enough

   Recently I learned a hard lesson, and I don't know about you, but it seems that God uses experiences as the best way to open my eyes and teach me things. After a 50ish hour work week I came home one night exhausted, stressed, worried, clueless, etc. My daughter was about to turn four years old yet I felt like a new mom on the day she brings home her first newborn... "Now what?". I would get on Facebook (darn you social media) and see moms driving their kids hours to get a picture with Santa in a brand new $75 Christmas outfit. I would see crafts that other moms had spent hours with their kids making. I would see pictures of moms posting large overly expensive gifts they had gotten for their children. There I was coming home from work after a twelve hour day, and it's all I could do to get my daughter bathed and fed and in bed all while listening and asking about her day. And I thought, "now what? What else can I do tonight to show her I love her?"

   Needless to say, I started questioning everything I was doing as a mother. I haven't taken her for Santa pictures this year, am I bad mom? I haven't bought her a brand new red and green outfit, do I really even care about her? We didn't make the first homemade ornament this year, am I using my time with her wisely? Does she even know how much I love her without those things?

   Now I am by no means condemning these mothers. In fact, I'm APPLAUDING you. Really. But it was in this moment God brought a verse to my head that brought so much comfort: "For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast." Eph 2:8-9

   If God can accept my heart and love for Him in a way other than works and doings, how much more could my own daughter accept my love without the works? 

In the new year I hope and plan to make more time for crafts, Santa pictures, and fun trips to the zoo. However, whether you're a single mother or not, loving your children unconditionally is enough some days without the bells and whistles. Working a full time job, providing food on the table, listening to them talk about their day, loving on them, having patience, and most importantly teaching them about Jesus is enough. You are enough. Social media is not the handbook to parenting, and we should stop looking to it for advice and to compare ourselves. So, here's to squeezing in a quick bath and singing "You Are My Sunshine" before bed and calling it a day, a good day, cute pajamas or not.

-The Not So Perfect Mom, Caroline

2016 Reading List

My first goal was to read a book a week, every week in the year of 2016. I still intend to read 52 books next year, but not necessarily one a week. I am laying out a plan for four books a month (1-48) and then four books to squeeze in (49-52) wherever I want to read extra. If I read them all in one or two weeks of the month I may take the other weeks off. (Not that this is a job, I love to read and am truly looking forward to this). This list may change according to recommendations and swap outs. If I don't like a book by the fifth chapter I will not finish it. Life is too short to read books you don't enjoy. So keep in mind some of these might be swapped out if someone highly recommends a new book or if I don't like the one I am reading. I will be doing a book review every week as well. I will be letting you know where I am in the process, what book I'm on, and my thoughts.

Comment below and share some of your favorite books with me!

Keep in mind that changes may be due to the fact that I rent most of my books from the library in my city using their online library. Books are placed on hold depending on how many people before you have requested it. Each person keeps the book a limited amount of days. I would love to be able to read season appropriate book during certain months, but that just may not be a possibility in some cases.

JANUARY

1.      Let it Snow- John Green, etc.

2.      As I Lay Dying-William Faulkner 

3.      The Dirt on Ninth Grave- Darynda Jones

4.      You- Caroline Kepnes

FEBRUARY

5.      Since You've Been Gone- Morgan Matson

6.      Dark Places- Gillian Flynn

7.      Consequences- Aleatha Romig

8.      All the Light We Can Not See- Anthony Doerr

MARCH
9.      Graduates in Wonderland- Jessica Pan

10.    The Mountain Story- Lori Lansens

11.    Girl Before a Mirror- Liz Palmer

12.    Anthem- Ayn Rand

APRIL

13.    In the Heart of the Sea- Nathaniel Philbrick

14.    From the Madding Crowd- Thomas Hardy

15.    Black Mass- Dick & Gerald Lehr

16.    You Shall Know Our Velocity- Dave Eggers

MAY
17.    Dash & Lily's Book of Dares- Rachel Conn & David Levithan
18.    See Jane Run- Joy Fielding

19.    Where'd you go Bernadette- Maria Semple

20.    The Husband's Secret- Liane Moriarty

JUNE
21.    Sin & Bone- Bette Golden & JJ Lamb

22.    The Kite Runner- Khaled Hosseini

23.    The Maze Runner- James Dashner

24.    Where She Went- Gayle Forman

JULY

25.    A Prayer for Owen Meany- John Irving

26.    Let's Pretend this Never Happened- Jenny Lawson

27.    Broken Harbor- Tana French

28.    The Light Between Oceans- M.L. Stedman

AUGUST

29.    The Opposite of Loneliness- Marina Keegan

30.    Me Before You- Jojo Moyes

31.    The Liar- Nora Roberts

32.    Breakfast at Tiffany's- Truman Capote

SEPTEMBER
33.    The Martian- Andy Weir
34.    The Lincoln Lawyer- Michael Connelly
35.    Pretty Girls- Karen Slaughter

36.    See Me- Nicholas Sparks

OCTOBER
37.    The Hollow- Jessica Verday

38.    Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children- Ransom Riggs

39.    The Selection- Kiera Cass

40.    Love Letters to the Dead- Ava Dellaira

NOVEMBER

41.    Of Mice & Men- John Steinbeck

42.    Let them Eat Cake- Sandra Byrd

43.    Eleanor & Park- Rainbow Rowell

44.    Silver Linings- Debbie Macomber

DECEMBER
45.    Let it Snow- John Green

46.    Maybe this Christmas- Sarah Morgan

47.    The Gun Slinger- Stephen King

48.    Forever & Always Collection- E.L. Todd

These four I will fit in wherever I am caught up on the others.

49.    Go Set a Watchman- Harper Lee

50.    I'll Give You the Sun- Jady Nelson

51.    The Library at Mount Char- Scott Hawkins

52.    November 9- Colleen Hoover

-Kayla

Christmas Edition: Gifts under $25 for women

If you're like me then you have several friends that you would like to buy something special for without breaking the bank. I'm going to share with you my under $25 gift guide and hope you get inspired. (Men, this could be really beneficial for you as well)

1. Anthropologie

www.anthropologie.com

This website has some unique gifts that I have never seen before, but absolutely love. Two of my favorites in their gift section are without a doubt these coffee mugs and the gingerbread mug toppers. What an adorable way to serve someone a hot drink at a get together and let them keep it, or just to feel festive when you cozy up at home and watch it snow. These may be the most adorable things ever.

2. Forever 21

www.forever21.com

This site is an amazing place to find gifts for us lady folk. This is where I go for original gifts, lounge wear, and tall socks for winter. Everything is cheap, and in my experience, all is good quality for the money. From jewelry to make up to fashion this site has it all. $20 goes a long way here.

The first two places are wonderful, but for those that don't feel like ordering online here are some different tips.

1. A gift card for a massage or mani/pedi

2. A girt card to somewhere they love to shop but rarely splurge on themselves

3. Candles and books (of course I would say that) but get creative and write a note in the front of the book. Someone recently did this for me and I LOVED it.

I hope this helps. If all else fails remember, everyone loves to eat! A good meal is hard to beat.

-Kayla